I am taking the time to write this to be an encouragement to those struggling with dyslexia. I am now sixty nine (2011). I was never diagnosed with Dyslexia because I when I went to school in the 50s and no one knew what it was. I only learned about this disability when my son in the first grade was diagnosed with it. We sent him to a special school, that although helped, did not cure the problem.

I passed the 1st and 2nd grades, but failed the third. I got through the rest of my grades and graduated from high school in 1961. My grades ranged from "B-" to "C-s." I would study for hours for a test and then make a C- or fail. I did a lot of extra makeup work to help my grades. Each week in grammar school, I would study ten spelling words during the week, and the night before the test had learned each of them. However, the next day when it was test time, I would not be able to remember them all.

          I was confused and frustrated by my "stupidity." I knew what my fellow classmates thought about me. I would try really hard, but do poorly. I was terribly self conscious and embarrassed by my poor achievements. I knew my teachers and the other students looked down on me and I was dubbed as being slow or dumb. I really wanted to make my parents proud of me, but really never could. I did not know what the problem was...but everyone else did, I was simply unintelligent and slow.

         I really have no idea how I was able to finish High School. None of my four siblings did, nor had my father. I guess the one thing I had going for me was just plain old stubbornness and refusing to quit. Others in High School dropped out, and I thought about it, but my father insisted that dropping out was not an option. Thank God for my wise father. After High School I worked in a factory for a year on an assembly line and did quite well. I found I could do anything mechanical. I excelled in everything they wanted me to do and was promoted and given raises. But it was a dead end job, and so I joined the Army and later the Air Force serving for seven years.

          I wanted to go into electronics, but my test scores prevented that, so they put me in communications. It was not easy, but I worked hard and did well. One thing that helped me in the Army was no one knew I had done poorly in school. I was given opportunities to advance and rank as fast as they could promote me. For two years I was the Communications Center Chief in a Group Communications Center in Germany. After I was discharged I joined the Air Force and made Staff Sargent after returning from a year in Vietnam. I left both services with outstanding evaluations and efficiency reports. I would stay late, and worked very hard at learning the job.

          I took typing in High School and my job in both services was administrative. This helped me to learn to administrative and leadership skills and helped me to cope with the problem. I forced myself to work at spelling and made me a little book of difficult words I could not remember. I carried a pocket dictionary and a thesaurus with me in my back pocket. After I was discharged I took and passed every technical course I could in electronics and started a Security Systems Company which became very successful. I designed and installed security systems in businesses, banks and large factories. Two of the factories were over 1.5 million square feet. After I left it merged with NAS and later was brought by ADT. It was satisfying to know the Army would not let me train in the field of electronics, but I learned it on my own and became proficient in electronics.

          The Security Systems business became very successful, but I resigned at 36 years old. God was calling me to preach so went to Bible college to become a pastor. One of my high school teachers laughed when my mother told her what I was doing and that I would be going to college. As my high school teacher she knew I was not college material! Because of my SAT scores I had to take several remedial courses including English, but I took the five year program, and finished it in only four years completing 168 hours with a 263 gpa at 40 years old earning a ThB. It was no fun having to work so hard, but somehow, with God's help, I kept going. Sixteen years later, at 56 I began working on a graduate program and at 59 graduated with 3.33 gpa and a MBS. I have taught college Bible courses in two schools. I am presently working on my doctorate. I do not know if I will be able to complete it, but I am trying. Over the years I have written many articles on the Bible and Theology. I write 95% of my sermons and all my Bible Studies and Sunday School lessons. In 1996 I taught myself HTML programming and began my a web site Bible Truth, where I post my material. It presently averages 85,000 to 110,000 visitors each month from over 215 countries. (Bible-truth.org). I have pastored five Baptist churches. As a missionary church planter I has seen the Lord establish four sound biblical churches in the Mormon heartland of Utah.

          I still have a hard time. I still make the same mistakes over and over and sometimes want to scream or just quit! It is hard to know you know the proper word and spelling and in your mind you type it correctly, but then go back and proof you work you find you typed another word and did not know you did it! I have to proof read my writing over and over and still miss mistakes. I often start to type a word I have spelled thousands of times, and at the moment can't remember how to spell it. Often I lapse into depression thinking about how dysfunctional I really am. I admit that I get a little angry at myself that what comes so easy for most people is so very hard for me. It is easy to have a pity party...and once in a while I have a one. I then remember who is I serve and ask the Lord to forgive me and get up and get going. No matter what I have been able to accomplish, I still feel like damaged goods and have little self esteem. It is so embarassing and deeply hurts too, especially when someone points out my errors in my material. I have tried to develop tough skin in regard to criticism, but it is still degrading especially knowing I have tried so hard. I don't think I will ever get over that because I know that dyslexia is forever.

          Let me get to the point of this. If you are dsylexic I want you know I understand and I wish to help. My advice and encouragement to other dyslexics is this.....just don't quit, no matter how hard it is, how debilitating it is, and develop a tough hide because insensitive people will really repeatedly hurt you. Even my wife of 50 years still does not really understand what being dyslexic means. She gets frustrated with me when she tells me things and I get them confused or forget in a few minutes. She takes it as a personal affront....when it never is. I love her dearly, she is a jewel and so tolerant and forgiving. She has had a lot to put up with, but has helped and stood by me. She is a special lady and I do not know what I would have done without her.

          It is difficult to write about this because it exposes my deficiency for everyone to see, but if it is an encouragement to someone then it is worth the humiliation. Please, take godly pride in knowing what it really takes for you to accomplish even little things. Do the best you can with the talents and skills the Lord has given you. Do not be discouraged even though few people, if any, acknowledge how hard it was for you to do ordinary things. I have watched people get awards and personal recognition for things that just came natural to them with little effort. I worked ten times harder to get the task completed, but no one cared. It might seem hard to understand, but I thank God for my dyslexia, because it kept me humble and made me have to work hard, really hard, to do even ordinary things. I kept me from being prideful. Maybe without it I would not have been able to accomplish the things I have. The Bible has many examples of God using imperfect and insignificant people to serve Him.

          I have learned that although dyslexics have a reading disability, they are often high talented. For example Albert Einstein, Walt Disney, and a host of other successful men were dyslexic. I wonder what the world would have lost had they been dismissed because they misspelled a word or made a grammatical errors, or were forgetful of simple things, or just gave up.

          Dyslexia will always be with you, but you can learn to lessen its effects and cope with it. You can turn it into a asset if you refuse to quit and let it defeat you. It is not easy and certainly no fun to have this disability. Certainly people will not understand which can be hard on you. But if you fight, refuse to give in, and keep going you can live a good life and accomplish about anything you want to. And though you will rarely if ever be recognized for you accomplishments, you will have the personal satisfaction of knowing that you did the best you could and overcame great odds.

          The greatest and most important event in my life was when upon hearing God's truth, the Gospel, from His word the Bible, I believed and the Lord graciously forgave my sins and gave me eternal life. My personal faith in Jesus Christ and His help has been the most important and invaluable thing in my life. Knowing that the Lord was helping me, often I did not even recognized His presence. When I get down I remember two things. Once in heaven I will not be dyslexic. Second, I remember what David wrote, who experienced great sorrow in his life:

"Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass." (Psalms 37:4-5)

          Please be encouraged and never give up! God bless you and give you a wonderful life.
Cooper P Abrams III

My life's verse: "I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith." (Romans 12:1-3)

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